Sunday, November 30, 2008
'twas a happy thanksgiving... but a boring post.
Our loooong weekend was quite enjoyable. Really, the whole week seems like a blur, but I'll try to recap. I actually did NOT take any pictures, as I had left my camera in the car on accident. Oops!
I spent all of Tuesday night cleaning, cleaning, cleaning, and man- did my downstairs look good! I was pleased, at least... but I'm not too tough of a critic when it comes to cleanliness- haha. But it was dusted, vaccuumed, swept, mopped, organized, toy box cleaned, tub scrubbed, sinks cleaned, laundry folded. Ahhh... a clean home. :) Brandon and Holly got in late- like 1 ish I think, and we briefly chatted and went to bed.
Wednesday, Brandon and Holly left around 11a.m. to head to Holly's Mom's, and I finished some laundry and packing, and when Jordan got home shortly after 1, we headed to Cville. I took JD and Jordan with me to the grocery store (mistake) to get some things for Mom. There were no carts available when we got there, and the place was a mad house... and I had two boys and a baby with me! It was chaotic, but we managed. I was somehow conned into making dinner- haha- but I made a darn good Mexican Lasagna, and it was nearly all eaten between Jordan, myself, Mom, JD, and Corban. A success, I'd say. I'm sure we played a game or two of Scrabble somewhere in there, too. It was nice to just be home though, and with my family.
Thursday we continued our annual tradition of starting the day at the Sugar Creek Pie Run. This was my first- and hopefully last- year as a walker. It was nice to walk and chit chat with Mom and Aunt Lisa... but it's just not the same as racing. And plus, I usually put in close to 10 miles on Thanksgiving morning, and I put in just over 2 with my walk. I've been getting that itch recently... I am SO ready to run. And I want to really do it this time, like actually get back into shape. I think with two babies and ministry and house cleaning and cooking, I am going to want the time to myself and the stress relief. And I want to prove to myself that I still have it in me, that I can still be disciplined and motivated. Anyway. We had a delicious meal at Mom's, with the wonderful company of Aunt Lisa, Uncle Jay, Ally, Grandma Barb, Aunt Jo, Mom, Jack, JD, Jordan, Corban, and myself. Unfortunately, there wasn't too much leftover. Shucks. Ha. We played some intense catch phrase, and then headed to Jordan's family's house, where we ate again, chit-chatted, played apples to apples, just hung out. The boys played football on the play station or whatever they have.. and it was fun to watch them just be brothers. :)
Friday came way too early, as I got up at 4:40a.m. to begin Black Friday shopping at 5. Well, we left at 5, I guess. After a quick run through Starbucks drive through, we began our annual tradition (Brandon, Holly, and myself) of hitting Target, Family Christian bookstore, the mall, Wal-Mart, etc. We started shopping at 6, took a break for lunch, and got home around 4. I was beat. It was Brandon's 28th birthday (which, btw, is 2 years away from 30!-haha), so we went to dinner at Little Mexico to celebrate. Some of his friends came over that evening to celebrate, and we played MORE catch phrase. The girls completely dominated, winning 8 out of 10 games. Woo!! While it was a fun day, I was in every way exhausted. For the first time in 2 pregnancies, I had swelling. My calves felt like rocks and looked so big! My legs ached, my back ached, and I couldn't crawl into bed fast enough. I slept SO hard that night.
Unfortunately, Brandon and Holly had their second annual post-Black-Friday sickness, and had some sort of stomach bug the next day. Bummer. We didn't see Holly at all on Saturday, as she quarantined herself in the bedroom. Brandon didn't get sick until that night at his bday party with his friends. Bummer again. They headed back to PA today, but will be home in a few weeks.
Now that you've read my incredibly exciting recap, I hope you had a great holiday with your families as well. It was so nice just to be together, to be relaxing, enjoying the nothing-to-do schedule. The chaos, er, Christmas season has kicked off (haha- it really is my favorite time of year), and our weekends are pretty much packed between here and New Years- barring no birth of Baby Girl. I'm hoping to get out Christmas decorations tomorrow- but it's dependant on Jordan climbing up to the attic for me. Anyway, enough of this long, detailed, boring post. Good night!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
We went today for our first biophysical profile (BPP) for Baby Girl McG. These will now be happening once a week. Kind of pointless, really... because if my baby did have my heart condition, there wouldn't be a darn thing that could be done, unless she miraculously had an episode while I was getting a BPP, which... is pretty impossible, as it took all of 3 minutes for her to 'pass' the test. Anyway, I certainly don't mind the time watching my baby, but it's a long drive for 3 minutes of ultrasound. Anyway- she looked good, is head down, hands in front of face, moving like crazy. I'm now 33 weeks along. What?! Where has this time gone? 7 weeks remaining... it doesn't seem possible. I remember being this far along with Corban, and the anticipation, and feeling like he was going to be here 'any day now'... but this time around I feel like 7 weeks is lightyears away, that I have all the time in the world. Ha! My growing abdomen says otherwise, let me tell you. I'm definitely entering (okay- let me rephrase that... I'm in!) the uncomfortable stage. So for that reason, I'm thankful that there's 'just' 7 more weeks. But for a million other reasons, I'm thankful for those 49 days.
Brandon and Holly come tonight!! Have I mentioned that I love this time of year?? :) They'll get in around 11, and will leave around lunchtime tomorrow, but we'll see them again Thursday evening. And then Friday (which is Brandon's 28th(!!) birthday) we will join the crowds and chaos for that fun little thing called Black Friday. I've been looking forward to this day for months. :) I've got a pretty good list going of things I need from different places, and should be able to do the bulk of my remaining shopping. My one goal for this year is to be done wrapping before Christmas eve. :) Anyway, there's nothing too organized or formal going on this weekend, but it'll be a lot of QFT (quality family time), as my mom says. So excited!!
Well, Corban is asleep, and I really do have a tremendous amount of things that I'd like to get finished before Brandon and Holly get in tonight, so I should suck it up and get to work. I doubt I'll post before- so Happy Thanksgiving!!!
edit------------
So I did it, I mustered up the strength to get going... got out all of my paint supplies, etc. Grabbed the can of paint from the table, that I put there from the garage, only to discover that it wasn't an unopened can of white paint- but a can of RED! Gr. So I make my way to the uh.. paint closet (really, it is), where there is an embarassingly large mountain of paint cans. Found two more that didn't have the 'mixed' stickers, no paint on the side, so I figured I was in luck. Nope. One tan, one yellow. Seriously. THREE GALLONS of colored paint, unopened, unused. And with no plans of being used. What a waste! We majorly over-estimated when buying paint, I'd say. Man, I could sure use that $50 right about now, too. I called the Wal-Mart we bought them from, and they said they wouldn't return them. Oh dear. So now I'm out $50, and I still need white paint. I'm going to call the two other near-by wal-marts just to see what they say... hahaha. :)
Monday, November 24, 2008
I just talked to Mom and JD finished up chemo fine. He hasn't gotten sick, isn't feeling bad, and is just in the back seat of the car singing the cheemo song that he and Jordan made up today. They think he was feeling 'blah' like he was before we left because he ate waaay too late of a lunch- it was 2p.m. when we finally ate. Next time, they'll pack snacks and we'll be sure to have lunch to him at a normal time, and hopefully that will make a difference.
Hoping and praying that the night continues as smoothly for him!
This isn't going to be an easy road. Superman couldn't breeze through treatments like that, I don't think. I'm so thankful that we were able to be there to distract JD most of the day, as it has the potential to make for a long, boring afternoon... with 5 hours stuck to an IV pole. But I'm afraid. Afraid of a lot of things, quite honestly, but I'm really worried about this being hard for JD. Towards the end of the afternoon you could see it... you knew JD wasn't feeling himself. Feeling 'blah' was the term we agreed on. Unsettled stomach, cold, etc. I can't imagine feeling sick before it was even over, potentially feeling bad for a few days, and knowing that you had to do it every other week. It'd be more than a little disheartening. I hope he can continue to keep his head up like he has through 5 surgeries and 6.5 weeks of radiation. Just one more thing to be praying for.
The ride home was when I let my mind get the best of me. No need for details, but I eventually pulled myself together, and came to a very real realization:
I am really thankful for laughter.
Now that might seem like a wierd conclusion to draw at a time like this, but if you've ever met my family, my little brother, or my husband you know that sense of humor and laughter are core to their being. Take that away, and well, they'd be someone else. We sat in the lobby of the Peyton Manning's Childen's Center for Cancer and Blood Diseases and cracked up for hours. Seriously. And then we moved back to the area where the chemo recipients usually go, and laughed back there. My little brother is a riot. Even in the midst of all of this mess, he's made joke after joke after joke. Sure, maybe it's part defense mechanism, but JD is a hilarious guy. And my husband too. And then you put them together... and you have half-hour of "Cheemo sucks and gives me gas" sung over and over... in the lobby, mind you!
Anyway, my point being... the ability of my loved ones to maintain their senses of humor despite all of this has made things much easier. And I'm really grateful for that.
I'm so thankful that we can sit and laugh together, have fun together, just be together. I wouldn't trade a moment of that for anything. Really, we have so much to be thankful for, I have so much to be thankful for. It's so easy to lose perspective, to get wrapped up in the here and now. But I don't want to do that. I want to maintain a heart of thankfulness, regardless of the circumstances I face. Anyway...
I'm really exhausted. I can barely keep my eyes open, and I have about 873 loads of laundry that need done. Yuck. But, my son is napping (or at least laying quietly in his crib), and I'm going to take advantage of this time and try and get some stuff done. Please continue praying for our family, for JD, for his health, attitude, for that stupid tumor to stay away... for sense of humor, for lots of laughter....
Lots and lots of laughter. If nothing else, it sure makes my days easier. :)
Saturday, November 22, 2008
our house... in the middle of our street..our house...
We bought this house in mid-January. It was disgusting, to say the least. It was built in 1974 and had ALL of the original decor. I'm talking harvest gold countertops, flower-power wall paper, shag carpet in every color of the rainbow, even an avocado green shower! Whoa. Sick. Not only was it never updated, it was rarely cleaned. Ew. Sicker. But for some reason, we bought it anyway. (That's a joke, btw).
So maybe you're wondering- just why DID we buy the house? The house had lots of appeal to us, really. We came and looked at it early in our house hunting, which was many months before we bought the house, but there was just way too much work to be done, and it was already outside of our price range. Speaking of which, let me remind you... my husband works full-time for a church, and I'm a stay-at-home-mom, so our price range was not large, to say the least. And let me also add that we live in one of the wealthiest areas of Indiana, so the houses within our price range... few and far between. Unless we wanted to live in tha' hood, anyway. But back to our house.
We ended up putting offers in on two (or was it three?) different houses in this nearby neighborhood. It was less than 10 minutes from the church (which we were wanting) and outside of Marion County (which we preferred- b/c of ridiculous taxes). The homes were all built within the last 7 or so years, so they were in pretty good condition. The houses appraised nearly $30,000 above what we would've paid for them - but this was because they were repo's. Anyway, we got outbid (and we offered asking price!) and didn't get any of them in that neighborhood. Poo. We were looking at probably 5-7 houses once a week, for months. Fast forward a little while, and Jordan has a dream about this house. That morning, he tells me he thinks we should go look at it again. I liked it well enough, it was just too expensive, but I agreed we'd go. Come to find out later that day, the house had dropped $15,000 in price! Whoa Mama! All of a sudden, it was seeming very possible.
Long story short, we come back and quickly decide this is it, this is the one we want. After months (literally) of all kinds of junkola with ESCROW and blah blah blah, it was ours.
Oh yeah- I'm supposed to be writing why we wanted this house...
First of all, it's not in a one-on-top-of-the-other, cookie-cutter neighborhood, which is verrrrry rare around here, and especially within our price range. It also sits on .75 of an acre. This is really small if you're from the country like me, but it's giant compared to the .17 that one of the houses we put in offer on had. It also has cornfields across the street and behind the house, instead of rows of other houses. It's much bigger than most of the other houses we looked at, at just at 2000 sq. ft. It has lots of 'living room' type areas... two sunken living rooms, a was-dining-room converted office, eat-in kitchen. It has three bathrooms. It has a woodburning fire place. The master bedroom is ginormous, and I'm not kidding. It's split level with a biiiig sitting area, a built in vanity, two closets, a balcony off of it, and a full bath. Never mind the fact that the balcony is referred to as the 'death deck' and the shower in the master bath has never even been opened by me.. and the sink is only used to clean paint brushes....and it's avacado green haha. But you can see, there was some potential.
It's wrap around brick on the bottom, and it used to have rotting wood (yes, really) on the top... however, we re-sided it prior to moving in. We ripped out all of the shag carpet and replaced it with a nice tan frieze (sp?). We've painted (and already re-painted!) every inch of this place. And we also began the daunting task of painting all of the stained wood trim to white. I've spent several days this week taping and priming trim, chair rail, etc. and am almost finished. My goal is to be completely done with ALL painting downstairs by Tuesday night. Anyway, we laid ceramic tile in the kitchen, replaced the countertops, sinks, etc. We peel-n-stick tiled the downstairs half-bath, and just this weekend, the upstairs main bath. We also installed a pedastal sink downstairs, along with new light fixture and mirror. Oh yeah, we've replaced all light fixtures every where in the house, and have doorknobs and light switches that have yet to be installed. A few weeks ago, we replaced all of the windows. And friends, we are darn near being finished with the big, main things!
Phew.
I'm tired just thinking about it all. :)
So later this week, when things ARE done down here, I WILL post pictures. But... don't hold your breath, okay?? I do have a 16 month old with a double ear infection, I am nearly 8 months pregnant (!!), my little brother is starting chemo on Monday, family is coming in Tuesday night, and we will be gone Wednesday through Sunday... so there's lots of 'life' happening this week. But feel free to leave me a comment, cheering me on. :) I'd just LOVE to be able to check some things off of my working 'to do' list.
Friday, November 21, 2008
He's still a pipsqueak, weighing in at 22 lbs 6 oz. and just below the 25th percentile, and 31 inches long, putting him right at 50th percentile.
The poor boy has another double ear infection. I've lost count- I don't know what number this is. I suspected it early this week, and unfortunately, I was right. He's acting great though, just a little sleepy and snotty.
My house is really really messy. Everywhere. I've got the couch pulled out in the fireplace room, because I was priming the trim and chair rail. I have
everything off of my kitchen coutertops and on my kitchen table, as I was painting that half of the kitchen. Let me tell you about that. See, a couple months ago, I painted all of it red. And it was-whoa-red. Overwhleming, to say the least. SO I decided that I would paint the half by the cabinets and countertops to tone things down. I bought a very nice shade of beige-ish gray and applied two coats while Corban napped on Wednesday morning. And when Corban napped on Wednesday afternoon, I painted it again, except this time tan. Haha. So this week, I've applied two coats of primer and four coats of paint in the kitchen. Talk about wasted time! Anyway, I haven't put the kitchen back together yet, because I have to paint the trim around the windows and the cabinets above the fridge still.. but I need to finish priming the chairrail in the other room so I can do all the white paint at once. Brother! It would be much easier if Corban slept all day (haha), but he's trying to get down to just one nap, making my schedule have much less free time. Well, maybe not freetime, but less Corban-free time. And if he's awake, there's not a chance I can paint anything within his reach. Which is everything below the kitchen countertops....
Moving on now.
Anyone want to come clean and paint my house for me? I make a mean batch of chocolate chip cookies...haha Okay, seriously done with that now.
My in-laws are coming up tonight, and my father-in-law and husband are going to finish our upstairs bathroom!!!!! I will post pictures once it's finished- before and after pictures. It was not pretty, to say the least. Peach walls, train border, red-white-blue shag carpet. Yuck. But no longer!
And guess what we have planned for tomorrow??
NOTHING!!!!!!!
It is a rare, rare occurance for our schedule to be completely free on a Saturday. Oh man, am I excited. A whole day at home with my boys! :)
And Sunday is the kick-off for our Holiday festivities, starting after church with the Taylor cousins family Thanksgiving, and then the church Thanksgiving dinner that evening. And then Brandon and Holly come on Tuesday night, and Wednesday Jordan only has to work half day, and he's off until the following Monday!!! AND- I get to decorate for Christmas. I loooove this time of year!
But anyway, my son just shut himself in the hallway bathroom, so I'm off to rescue him. Happy Weekend!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
oncologist appointment
Anyway- contrary to what we were initially told, chemo will NOT be 5 days in a row, every 2 to 3 weeks. Instead, it will be ONE day every two weeks. The treatment will last about 5 hours, as they will be giving him two different chemo drugs, anti-nausea medicine and ... fluids? i think. They plan on doing this for 4-6 months, and at the end of that time period, will re-evaluate.
The medicines he will be being given are very strong and typically used to treat a very agressive form of brain cancer... HOWEVER- the side effects don't seem to be as severe as some chemotherapys' are. We just don't know exactly how he'll respond to it (but who will be surprised if he breezes through it? Certainly not me!), but it sounded like it could be 2-3 bad days (meaning nausea, vomiting, diarrhea) for every treatment, which again is once every two weeks. They will do an MRI in one month, which will have been 6 weeks out from his surgery and after 2 doses of the chemo.
The chemo, like I said, is usually used on a very aggressive type of cancer. JD's tumor is very rare, and the cases of it reoccurring like JD's has done, even more so. It DID end up still being PXA, but with anaplasia... which means it has malignant tendancies. While the cells were initially dividing at a 4% rate, they now divide at a 30% rate. Simply put- what used to take 6 months to grow, now grows in 1.2 months. Thus the reason for the quick surgery and quick start on chemotherapy. In using the medicines that they have chosen for chemotherapy, they are treating JD very aggressively and proactively, which we are so thankful for!
We have several things playing on our side. One, there is currently no tumor in JD's brain... just cells. This is much easier to treat than a large mass. Two, JD has never had chemotherapy before, and is over 2.5 years out from radiation. The doctor said something about the tumor cells 'getting smart' and morphing with the chemo or something like that. His 'cells' haven't been exposed to chemo yet. And we're hitting them early with the hard stuff. Three, JD is young and in very good health. And lastly, we serve a big God, and we have lots and lots of people fighting on JD's behalf.
Again, our family thanks you for all your support. If I could express how the love extended has helped lighten the load, I would. But just know, your kind words, prayers, meals, bracelet-wearing, etc. is very deep reaching. You've helped us walk through a very difficult thing and we are so, so grateful. But please- KEEP PRAYING!! :)
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
warning: emotions running rampant ahead.
I'm having a baby in approximately 7 weeks or less, and it's the furthest thing from my mind. She doesn't have a name, even. And I haven't even been looking. She has some clothes, but I haven't washed the car seat or organized her stuff or bough her any diapers- nothing.
I feel like the rest of life needs to be put on pause, and we can resume when this nightmare is over.
JD will be starting chemo on Monday. They will be doing a very intense dose for his first round, as they feel this will bring the best results. Usually radiation is accompanied when treating this type of tumor, but we've maxed out radiation on that part of the brain as it is, at least that's the impression that has been given. There is no normal protocol, as the type of tumor he has is extremely rare- the doctors keep emphasizing that. We could get second opinions, but that will just delay treatment starting. But we trust Dr. Young, and are confident that he would treat JD no different than he would treat his own son.
So we wait. Wait and rest. Wait and pray. Wait and cry. Wait and hope.
In my quiet time this morning, I stumbled upon (not coincidentally) verses that were very important to me my freshman year of college... another story for another day... but I hadn't read them in years, and had never read them in NKJV, which I now prefer. I think I'm going to pass them along to my mom and brother as well:
Psalm 18:29-32
For by You I can run against a troop,
By my God I can leap over a wall.
As for God, His way is perfect,
the Word of the Lord is proven,
He is a shield to all who trust Him.
For who is God, except the Lord?
And who is a rock, except our God?
It is God who arms me with strength,
And makes my way perfect.
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer...
If you haven't noticed, my emotions are all over the place. Put life circumstances on top of almost 8 months pregnant, and you have a mess.
Off to paint...
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Mom talked to JD's neurosurgeon on the phone- so I didn't hear all of the details or anything, but got the basic rundown of what information there is right now.
We still don't have the complete official pathology report, but the place in Pittsburg has its entire staff working on picking apart and trying to pinpoint exactly what JD's tumor is. Previously, the tumor has been a PXA, but the pathology has shown that is no longer looking or acting like that kind of tumor. It is acting more aggressively. It seems to be acting like another type of tumor, but doesn't have all of the characteristics of that certain kind. Dr. Young said it is more important for them to accurately identify than to have a quick answer... so we will continue to wait.
My family will go Friday to meet with Dr. Libros, the doctor who oversaw JD's radiation, to discuss whether or not more radiation will be possible as treatment. And, I'm assuming once we have the official pathology, JD will start chemotherapy.
Obviously, this was not the news we were hoping for. I guess it's not unexpected, with what we were told prior to surgery, but the reality of what we're getting ready to face is sinking in. Please be praying for JD, for our family, for the doctors, the people working on the pathology report...
I was sure by now, God, you would have reached down,
wiped our tears away, stepped in and saved the day.
But once again I say 'amen' and it's still raining.
As the thunder rolls, I barely hear you whisper through the rain
"I am with you,"
And as Your mercy falls, I'll raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away...
And I will praise You in this storm, and I will lift my hands
For You are who You are no matter where I am
Every tear I've cried, You hold in your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn...
I will praise You in this storm.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
But then realization hit like a ton of bricks, and I had to make a new list of all the things that STILL have to be done that were contingent upon the completion of the first list. Oh brother! And then, we were at a house this weekend with lots of fun paint colors and nice trim and cool do-it-yourself decorations that totally gave the house a completed, decorated look.... and my list has tripled in my mind. So- since my real journal is tucked away in my husbands timbuktu bag at church, and this pregnant brain feels more than slightly overwhelmed at all the things that would be really wonderful if completed in the eight weeks, you get to view my
work-in-progress, to-be-completed-prior-to- 1/16/09 list:
- finish putting away laundry. (I'm pretty sure this is on every list I have ever written).*
- finish taping off trim downstairs*
- buy primer and more white paint, paint trim*
- buy paint for Baby Girl's bedroom
- buy paint for Corban's big boy room
- paint kiddos bedrooms
- finish started decorations for BG's room*
- empty Corban's closet
- get flooring stuff for bathroom*
- price carpet, laminate, other options for Corban's 'new' room (It is the only room that didn't have shag carpet, carpet appeared to be in good shape, so we didn't replace it... but after moving in we've realized that it smells like cat urine).
- continue hunt for a dresser to revamp and make shabby chic for BG's room (and find one and do it)
- take stack of 'stuff' from Corban's new room to Goodwill
- Talk Jordan into doing: floor in bathroom, light fixture in bathroom, faucet in bathroom, trim in kitchen and bathroom, crown moulding in kitchen..... and so on and so forth.
See, that's not so much, right?! Ha ha ha... hahaha. The * are things that I want to do this week. Ideally, I'd like to (really) have all of this done by Christmas, as I'm full term the day after. And I didn't even mention the re-organizing my cabinets or cleaning out my fridge that I've started to have an itch to do... or the can of 'blonde' colored paint I plan on purchasing to repaint my just painted hallways, since I hate the nearly-peach color they ended up being. Or the idea for the picture frame collage I have brewing in my head, to replace the decorations currently above the couch. Or the 'stick' curtain rods I need to hunt out of the woods for Corban's camping/outdoor/lodge themed room he will soon be moving to. And really, the things that will probably get done first are the things in this paragraph, not the bullets, because these are the things that I want to do and see done. Except for the trim. And of course, everything on Jordan's list. :)
Anyway, I'm off to finish taping the trim down here. I did start that this evening... it's such a tedious thing to do! and I want to get it all done tonight. And as I first mentioned, it's dangerously close to bedtime, so I'm outta here!
Friday, November 14, 2008
But I'm sitting here, waiting on Jordan to get to my parents house. I ended up chickening out (or using my brain, I'm still undecided) and not attending the North game. They lost though, which is a bummer. It was good to just hang out here though. My grandparents are in from Mississippi, and I don't get to see near enough of them. So extra time was enjoyed.
I'm slightly releaved that football season is over. I have loved watching the games, watching Isaac dominate, but we have literally been to Cville every weekend since September. I am ready for a Saturday morning in my bed, with my husband, and without my son in the same room. Reference the first paragraph if you're wondering why. Corban just DOES NOT sleep well if we're in the room with him. It's always a battle... every single weekend. Thus the reason I am ready for one at home. Notice I said O N E. Because the following weekend will be Thanksgiving, and back in town we will be.
Anyway, I'm really really really looking forward to tomorrow. We're hanging out with our friends Shane and Alyssa, whom we see way too little of because both of our crazy schedules. They have been instrumental in our lives in so many areas. They started out as our youth leaders in high school, turned into mentors, and are now friends. It's one of those relationships that I value so much, and I treasure any time spent with them. The boys are going to the Bell Game at Wabash, and us ladies are staying home in the warm house with the kiddos. I can't wait!
JD continues to do incredibly. We've play about 1209754397 games of Scrabble the last few days, and he's given me a run for my money, and even beaten me some. And no, I didn't let him, though I wish I could say I did- haha. Quite honestly, you would never ever know that anything has ever been wrong, let alone that he had BRAIN surgery a week and two days ago. The recovery time this time has been non-existant. He came out of surgery completely himself. Well, nearly, anyway. I'm floored and amazed.
And now, I'm rambling. So I'm going to go park my rear on the couch and hope that Jordan makes an appearance soon, as I'm way past ready to sleep. Goodnight!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
a few thoughts...
While a little optimism and kindness certainly aren't character flaws, this let's-keep-everything-surface-so-no-one-gets-hurt bologna is.. bologna. I've recently seen how my desire to be on good terms with everyone and never hurt feelings has resulted in- you guessed it- hurt feelings! Because, selfishly, it was easier for me to leave a situation unaddressed than to stomach a few uncomfortable moments and say 'I don't care, I love you anyway,' I've caused hurt and bitterness in a big way. I hate that. Why wasn't I obedient to the Lord? Why did I refuse to make a phone call, or make a little effort? Ugh. All they needed was a little 'This doesn't change Jesus' love for you, so it doesn't change mine..' and I sat in silence. Do you know why? Because I would've had to address the part about them being wrong, about their choices being contrary to what the Bible teaches is right. And this wasn't some stranger. It wouldn't have been uncalled for for me to speak to them in that way. We have, or at least had, a good relationship, one that could be open like that. And I blew it. I contributed to their lack of faith in the body of Christ. I misrepresented Jesus to them by my silence. I played a part in their withdrawal from church as a whole. You have no idea how this grieves me... how my heart breaks.
So what now? Where does one go with this knowledge, this revelation? I'm certainly not patting myself on the back when I say this, but I found all of this out by finally doing what the Lord would've had me do months ago. I went (okay, through the internet) to this person and apologized, asked for forgiveness for my lack of effort, explained that my lack of communication was not a lack of care. And I addressed 'the issue'. They then told me of the bitterness and hurt that it had caused, and I deserved that. They also gave me more than I deserved with explanations and second chances. I'm thankful for re-opened doors, and I'm so praying that I don't drop the ball again. Obedience, obedience, obedience. I wouldn't be here now had I done what I was supposed to when I was supposed to do it. Who knows how things could be? No good will come from entertaining these what ifs, though, so I'll leave it right there.
With my husband being in full-time ministry, and me choosing to partner up and walk alongside him in that... this most certainly was not the first, and will not be the last time a situation like this occurs. It is so hard for me to point things out to the kids, to say that that's not right. But by not doing so, I'm doing them a disservice. Please don't misunderstand me- my job is not to play Holy Spirit or to police their every move, but when I see things that aren't glorifying to the Lord or reflecting Jesus' love, we do have a responsibility to say something. But not just because Jordan's their youth pastor, but because that's what we're supposed to do as the body of Christ. And I want the same done for me.
Anyway, this is just another one of those bumps in the road, slowing me down, causing me to open my eyes, really look around and ask the Lord to do a new work in my heart. I want to be faithful next time, obedient. I want to represent the love that God has for us... even when it's hard. I want to think less of myself and what is easy and more of what God would have me do, even when it's so contrary to my nature. I want to be victorious in this area of my heart.
Now that I've aired my dirty laundry (haha), I'm off to fold some that is clean!
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Sometimes:
Sometimes we play in the wagon, and Corban holds the stick....
And sometimes, he likes to wear Daddy's gloves...
Sometimes we have bonfires....
And very rarely, I get a burst of inspiration and decide to make the wall hangings for our baby girl's nursery. (this is an unfinished product, btw. I have to go get more brads for the daisies, and I think I'm going to put another ribbon through that thick one across the top.. I don't like it is much as I thought I would before I stuck it down.)
Thursday, November 6, 2008
a m a z e d
Brain surgery #5 is apparently a cake walk for JD Taylor.
Who cares that this was the most invasive one yet... or, you know, that he just had one 3 months ago to the day? No skin off his back!
JD is up and at it this morning. He called our Aunt Lisa and sang Happy Birthday to her at 6a.m. He's talking, talking, talking without a problem. He ate some oatmeal. He asked for a wheelchair so he can go roam the halls.
Brain surgery, what?!
They did an MRI this morning and it looked great... perfectly clear, no swelling.
Can I please get a "Praise the Lord"? Or a "God is good... all the time!"?
I am simply amazed. JD will be moved from ICU sometime this morning to a regular room, where it doesn't appear he will be staying for too long.
Oh man. This is just awesome! God is SO good!
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
surgery update
Things could not have gone any better than they did today. We have so, so, so much to be praising the Lord for. Without going into details right now, things definitely aren't seeming as bad as they did a week ago. The doctor said the tumor did not look like the high-grade aggressive tumor he was anticipating, but we're waiting on pathology to confirm. It was most definitely a good report.
And, JD is recovering incredibly. I think he seems to be doing better than his last surgery, as far as talking, his color, etc... and this one was even more invasive.
What a big God we serve, huh? My heart is overflowing with praise!!!
Check www.caringbridge.org/visit/jdtaylor2 for more updates, and probably more details.
I'm out for now!
surgery in progress..
Things were a little different than 'normal' this morning- whatever no
rmal for brain surgery is. Usually we are able to be back waiting with JD for a while before they take him back. This morning, we were only in there long enough to pray with him, and then they took him up for a stealth MRI. When they took him, they said he'd be gone for 15-30 minutes, and then return to the room before going into surgery. They, unfortunately, changed their minds though... I was frustrated with this because I didn't get to hug him and tell him I loved him because I thought I was going to see him before he went into surgery. But anyway.
They came out shortly after 8 and told us they were taking him into surgery then. They will first be putting in the port, basically an internal iv surgically implanted in his chest. This will be used for chemo, blood work, etc. instead of having to stick him in the arm everytime.
Mom will be updating on his caringbridge site periodically throughout the day. Please, feel free to leave comments here or on that site- JD really enjoys reading through them, and it's such an encouragement for the whole family.
Please continue praying!! Surgery is expected to last 3-4 hours. I'll update once it's done.Thank you, and God bless!!!
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jdtaylor2
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Real Quick..
Surgery is going to be on Wednesday, but we don't know what time yet.
That's really all the new news we have right now.
In other news...
We have a houseful of new windows!! With screens! Whoa, what an improvement. Our house, which was built in 1974, had the original single-pane wood windows, with an occassional screen. I typically referred to them as non-windows, as they were really terrible at doing their jobs. For example, last winter we had the celophane wrap stuff covering them, all nice and tight and secure. The wind gusts which our windows did nothing to slow blew the plastic right off. Oh man, was it a cold winter. But no longer! :) And for that, I am glad.
I did a lot of laying around today, while the boys slaved away. Quite honestly, I'm worn out. Aside from the emotional drain that the week brought, we also had a houseful of company (which we enjoyed very much), but I'm just tired. Being nearly 30 weeks pregnant might have something to do with it... but I've enjoyed my spot on the couch with a book in hand.
And while my son is still napping, I'm going to return to my spot and finish my book. Happy Weekend!