Thursday, December 16, 2010

third

We've passed the half-way mark of December, Christmas just over a week away... which means... 
there's a baby coming soon.

I'm overwhelmed.

I'm thrilled, overjoyed, anxious... 
but the reality of it scares me to death.
Three
Three kiddos. The oldest- three and a half. The middle- nearly two and as strong willed and spirited as they come. If it were just the middle alone, my days could be hard... but now... there will be three to take care of.
Being this pregnant and having just two, the thought of most 'normal' activities exhausts me. It's so much work to tie all the shoes and find all the gloves and buckle all the straps and remember cups and blankies. 
And now... 
we add a third.
Will I really be able to do this?
I know.. I know it'll be fine. One day we'll work into a new normal and it'll seem as if this little one has always been here and I'll laugh at myself thinking it was hard with 'just' two.
But today- I'm overwhelmed by the thought.

Don't get me wrong. I'm SO ready to meet this little one, to see if my suspicion is correct, if this really is another little girl, to see who they look like and if they're a content little baby like their siblings were, to watch this little life melt our hearts and intertwine perfectly into our family, as if they've always been with us...
I can't wait for that. 
It'll be good. It'll be fine. I know it will.
I will survive...
Right?

Anyway. The two who are here are both out of their beds not napping, and the laundry isn't folding itself, either, so I've got some work to do.
:)

(I really am thrilled about this baby, I hope you hear me... Just the honest thoughts of a mom who feels scared and nervous and afraid that she'll never leave the walls of her house again. That's all.)


6 comments:

  1. This made me tear up a bit...just b/c I can relate so much right now! Going through the same emotions of being excited and wondering if I can really handle two instead of one! I can't wait to hear the news of your baby's arrival! Anyday now:)

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  2. I feel the same way! I just love this post!

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  3. you make being a momma look easy. this one will fit right in. <3

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  4. Don't ever let anyone make you feel as if it ISN'T hard to add a a baby to the mix. No matter how many you have--one or 101--another life is another beautiful, mystery waiting to be unpacked. And you DO have your hands full!! I had four babies in 6.5 years...it's tough. But it's also wonderful. There's this peace and contentedness in the midst of chaos. And God DOES give us more than we can handle...so He can be bigger, greater, more Love than we could have imnagined. Enjoy your last days with the babies you know and savor the ones to come! Praying for you...and how about having that baby Tuesday? I'm willing to share my bday:)and my mom says bringing a baby home on Christmas day is just about the best way to celebrate:)

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  5. I don't even have a husband yet but I dream of lots of children, but the second I think of that I feel overwhelmed. Then, I remember that they come one at a time (usually). I am really enjoying watching your adorable family grow through your blog. God Bless!

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  6. I'm so excited for you as you prepare to enter this next phase in your life! I have no doubt in my mind that you will be just as amazing as a momma of 3 as ever before! I'm thinking it's a girl too. I can't wait to see who this little person is!

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