Dictionary.com defintes the word deliberate as "carefully weighed or considered; studied; intentional". So much of what I do, decisions I make fall into its antonym category of hurried, uninentional, accidental. I'm feeling a tug on my heart- in so many ways- to live on purpose.
* I want to deliberately discipline my son.
* I want to be deliberate with the words I say, conversations.
* I want to be deliberate in our spending.
* I want to be deliberate in our eating.
* I want to deliberately schedule our days.
* I want to play purposefully.
* I want to be intentional in my prayer time.
* I want to decorate our house deliberately.
* I want to spend my time intentionally.
My list could continue on (and on and on), but that's not the point. What I'm seeing so much in the way I'm currently living is how much I do things based soley on feeling or desire, simply what I want to do. Because of that, things I need to do are neglected. I am missing opportunities, missing out on relationships, encouragement, ministry. I don't want to continue on in this. I want to be intentional in my doings, deliberate with my words...
I've been reading 'My Utmost for His Highest' off and on for years, and yesterday's devotions said this:
"God engineers everything; and wherever He places us, our one supreme goal should be to pour out our lives in wholehearted devotion to Him in that particular work. "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might . . ." (Ecclesiastes 9:10 )."
That scripture speaks to my heart. Do it with your might. There is a deliberate-ness to our walk with the Lord. I love the section in Daniel (1:8) that says "Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself..." What am I purposing in my heart? Am I purposing anything at all? Am I being deliberate? The unfortunate answer is not nearly enough. I want to intentionally follow Jesus with everything that is in me. I want intentionally be Mama to my kiddos. I want to intentionally love, honor, respect, praise my husband. I don't want to be emotion-driven, lazy, if-it-feels-good-do-it anymore.
It's time to live on purpose.
P.S. We went to the zoo today, on this 80* late April today. It was fantastic. See?