third

We've passed the half-way mark of December, Christmas just over a week away... which means... 

there's a baby coming soon.

I'm overwhelmed.

I'm thrilled, overjoyed, anxious... 

but the reality of it scares me to death.

Three. 

Three kiddos. The oldest- three and a half. The middle- nearly two and as strong willed and spirited as they come. If it were just the middle alone, my days could be hard... but now... there will be three to take care of.

Being this pregnant and having just two, the thought of most 'normal' activities exhausts me. It's so much work to tie all the shoes and find all the gloves and buckle all the straps and remember cups and blankies. 

And now... 

we add a third.

Will I really be able to do this?

I know.. I know it'll be fine. One day we'll work into a new normal and it'll seem as if this little one has always been here and I'll laugh at myself thinking it was hard with 'just' two.

But today- I'm overwhelmed by the thought.

Don't get me wrong. I'm SO ready to meet this little one, to see if my suspicion is correct, if this really is another little girl, to see who they look like and if they're a content little baby like their siblings were, to watch this little life melt our hearts and intertwine perfectly into our family, as if they've always been with us...

I can't wait for that. 

It'll be good. It'll be fine. I know it will.

I will survive...

Right?

Anyway. The two who are here are both out of their beds not napping, and the laundry isn't folding itself, either, so I've got some work to do.

:)

(I really am thrilled about this baby, I hope you hear me... Just the honest thoughts of a mom who feels scared and nervous and afraid that she'll never leave the walls of her house again. That's all.)