well well well

I fell off the wagon. 

Twenty two days of thirty isn't too shabby for an inconsistent blogger like myself, though, right??

I wish I could find my camera battery charger so that I could upload pictures from our fantastic long weekend... but alas, it's missing for the moment. Regardless- it was one of the more relaxing holidays, it seemed, and for that I'm really thankful.

We spent lots of time with family. We pretty well split the time between my parents and Jordan's, and it was wonderful.

We ate a lot of delicious food and played a lot of games. I love times like that. A lot.

:)

I went Black Friday shopping and walked for the majority 10ish hours.

I didn't get spectacular deals and found myself mostly frustrated by the chaos in the early morning. Toys R Us was in complete disarray and out of everything I wanted and I was none too pleased.

My mood brightened after a chocolate chip bagel and hazelnut coffee from Panera, though. I have around 5 or so gifts left to buy... but if you remember my previous post, that's a whole lot less than 2 million, so I can't complain.

:)

My baby dropped. Like, noticeably, inches lower dropped. Weird. I don't remember it ever being so obvious before. I've found myself getting my hopes up that this one will arrive sooner than later... and then I read my blog from this point in pregnancy with Cate. It appears that I thought the same thing for the same reasons with my baby girl who didn't arrive a moment sooner than her due date. 

Crud.

I will say, though, that the contractions aren't near as constant as they were my other two pregnancies. This makes life much more enjoyable. I am more tired than I've ever been in my whole life, though.

Also, by golly, I am crossing things off my to-do list like crazy. 

Today we pulled out the Christmas decor and baby clothes. I sorted through three totes and have four piles to wash tomorrow- burp cloths and blankies, newborn sized baby girl clothes (oh, and are they ever precious!), newborn sized baby boy clothes (which I refuse to believe ever fit my 3.5 year old little boy), and a stack of white onesies and gender neutral gowns and sleepers. 

I've got to admit that I laid awake in bed for way too long last night worrying about those darn clothes and couldn't get them out of the attic fast enough today.

I'm down to my final two photo sessions as far as editing goes- and they're both started and will be finished before weeks end.

I scrubbed the tub and toilets and have conquered lots (and lots) of laundry.

I got groceries with two rambunctious toddlers, and that alone is worthy of some sort of award. Ha- joking, but it was none too fun this evening, as neither were interested in being stuck in a cart. 

OH! AND! We now have a working furnace.

PTL!!!

Alright. I must sleep. Pictures to come if I ever find my charger (which will probably keep me awake tonight...)

ummm...

Guys!

I'm suddenly 5 weeks away from my due date.

In those 5 weeks, we have Thanksgiving and Christmas, along with hundreds of little get-togethers and parties to attend. (Okay, maybe not hundreds...). I also have something like 2 million people to buy gifts for (not complaining- I LOVE buying presents. Like, love love love. And there might be a few less than 2 million). Let's not even discuss the monstrosity of a list I have going on home projects that need completed...

And then there is this possibility that the baby could come early. Like before Christmas is over. 

(insert major panic face here)

I need to go Christmas shopping. Right now. And mop the floors and fold the laundry and decorate for Christmas and dust the baseboards and scrub the floor and vacuum and buy a car seat and clean my room.

Oh.

My.

Word.

How did I suddenly become this pregnant? Why didn't I realize before that January 1st is only days after December 25th? Why didn't I start Christmas shopping in August? 

And tell me- why oh why did I think getting rid of 3 closets was a good idea? 

My house has never recovered from that transition. 

And I'm afraid that it never will.

I suddenly have this burst of energy... I want to do it all... like five minutes ago. I made a pretty good dent on my room (which bares the brunt of the closet transition) and have quite a goodwill pile going. I also have stacks of maternity clothes to pack away and piles of jeans that I so look forward to wearing in the near future. (darkwash skinny jeans... you've been missed. We'll meet again soon- I hope.)

I scrubbed toilets and counters and then laid on the couch and rested. And by rested, I mean scoured websites for baby names (zilch, zip, nada), but that's another post for another day.

And now... I must Christmas shop. 

Just waiting on my little girl to wake up from her nap, or Jordan to text back and say that he'd really love to go shopping with me tonight, so I'm not toting the kids around by myself. (ha... hahah...) It'd be amazingly amazing if I could be mostly done by the end of Black Friday. A lofty goal, yes, but feasible.

Annnnnnnnyway.

All of this to say- I'm really stinking pregnant.

And I want need some coffee.

And I hope to find some killer pre-Thanksgiving sales down at the outdoor mall.

=)

day 22

So I may have missed a few in there somewhere... oh well. :)

Today I'm thankful for the few quiet moments I got Saturday morning... 

solitude... 

peacefulness... 

time to sit and think and pray and wait. 

This end of pregnancy-ness overtaking me doesn't allow for much sleep, so when I woke hours before our planned wake up time on our 'retreat', I just went and sat outside by myself...

and it was perfect.

Quiet.

Relaxing.

Refreshing.

It's good to do... especially in the midst of all this busyness.. to have the time, make the time to just be still.

The warmer-than-normal fall morning combined with the pristine lake water and perfect, still fog only added to my time.

It was good to sit and pray for my marriage, for my role as wife, for our ministry, our unity, our role as parents. It was good to pray for my friends' marriages. To just talk to the Lord. and then to sit. And be still. Wait.

Over and over and over again Jordan and I have been hearing the same message: Be people of prayer. Be people who pray. People who wait. Make the time, carve out the time, do it however you can... but be people of prayer.

And so I sat. And prayed. And waited.

And it was good. 

So so good.

Be still and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!

(psalm 46:10)

I'm thankful for a lot involving this weekend, but being thrown back into a busy Monday made me so grateful for those few alone.. really alone.. moments I got, that sweet time I was able to have.

(Also in case you're wondering- these pictures were all taken with my new 35mm lens, and were not edited or modified in anyway. Those first few weren't converted to black and white- just the lack of color of the leaf-less trees combined with the thick fog.. and the way I took the picture.)

day 16 (17 and 18)

I am so thankful and SO stinkin excited to be finishing up my packing for the next few days.
First, we're going to Cville to my parents house... where my Grandma and Papaw from Mississippi will also be!!!!! I am so excited to see them and for them to see our kiddos, too. We last saw them in the beginning of May, so Corban and Cate have changed so much since last seeing them.
Then tomorrow, I'm dropping the kids off early afternoon with my in-laws and heading back up to Indy to prepare a meal and snack and to pack for myself and Jordan. We're heading down to a big cabin in Brown County with three other couples (who are all close friends) for a little mini marriage retreat. We've got lots of food and games planned, plus the viewing of the Bob Coy Marriage series sermons. I am soooooooooooo excited about it- majorly bummed that I'll be playing the single girl most of Friday, as Jordan won't be joining us until late Friday night (he's at a youth conference), but what can you do? Like I said, these are all close friends we'll be with, so it won't be uncomfortable or anything. I have to admit that I'm not sad at all to hear that the hot tub is broken-- since I would be sitting by myself while everyone else enjoyed- hahah!
Saturday evening we'll head back and pick up the kids and go to my parents house to celebrate my big brother's 30TH birthday! Whoa. :) JD and I had teased him for years that he was 'almost 30'... and, well, now he will be! Happy birthday, Brandon!! So glad you guys are back home in indiana... Cant wait to celebrate this weekend. :) Looking forward to the time with everyone, too! And then Sunday, we have our extended family Thanksgiving.
Lots of fun and exciting things! I hope I can keep up, as my energy is in the negatives these days (not to mention a baby who appears to have dropped and makes walking or moving quite uncomfortable). So with that- I won't be posting again until after the weekend. Hope you have a fantastic weekend!!

thankful for Caters... day 15

 

Short, sweet and picture heavy tonight- but I'm so thankful for my little girl- and the good checkup we had at the cardiologist today. I had more fear going into this appointment than ever before- but nothing has changed. She's either asymptomatic or the medicine is doing its job, but either way, there were no episodes recorded by her implanted device that indicate any need for change from what we're already doing. 

PRAISE THE LORD!

I'll spare you the medical details for now, but it's a tremendous relief for this Mama's heart that Cate's heart is just beating like it should.

I love this little girl more than words could ever say. I love how she becomes more and more of her own person every minute- that she's got her own sense of style and her own determined mind. I have a strong suspicion that she will not be a crowd follower... and I love her for that. :) She's my girl, my sweet baby girl, and I am so so so thankful for her.

 

And just to be fair- I love this little guy more than words could ever say, too, but that's another post for another day. :)

30 days of thankful- day14

I've loved this song for awhile now.

I listened it over and over while my brother was sick, and then even more so after he died. 

I've sung it to Cate every night before bed for many months. 

I've got many associations with it... both beautiful and painful... It's a song I treasure, and I'm thankful for, for many reasons.

 

 but I just recently learned of the last verse.

and the story behind the song.

and why John Mark McMillan wrote it and when he wrote it...

(You can hear it starting about the 6:00 minute mark in the video above... and you should.)

 -----

 Oh I thought about You the day Stephen died

and You met me between my breaking

I know that I still love You, God, despite the agony

See people, they want to tell me You're cruel

but if Stephen could sing, he'd say it's not true

because You're good...

 'Cause He loves us...

-----

I loved the song anyway. Thought the message was powerful, so powerful anyway. But I watched a video where JMM spoke of writing the song, and I was so thankful. 

He wrote this when his heart was completely broken. One of his best friends had just died. He was torn apart, angry, confused, hurt. 

In the video, he talked about how he's not talking about a pretty, happy love... but a love that is willing to love the messy 

and broken 

and difficult 

and gross. 

He said he wanted to write about how in his anger and frustration and resentment God could still love him through that, that He wasn't offended by it. 

Through tears, he talked about how after 7 years it's still really tough. 

He said the song is 'not a celebration of weakness and anger, but a celebration of a God who would want to hang with us through those things, despite those things.'

'That's the kind of love I'm talking about,' he finished the video saying.

 -----

Oh am I ever thankful for a God who loves in this way.

I spent much of the last year being messy and broken and difficult and gross... 

but I experience the goodness of God, His faithfulness and love like never before.

Oh, how He loves us!

30 days of thankful- days 11 and 12

-sweatpants. For real. If you've ever been 34 weeks pregnant, you can understand the depth of my gratitude.
-dinner with new(ish) friends.
-a little boys' first bike ride with his dad... Making a whole lap around the elementary school and then some!
-a new lens for my camera (35mm 2.0)
-being caught up on work (next up- laundry!)
-Cate nicknaming her big brother and only referring to him as 'Corbaniah'
-a husband who is willing to rub my back 687346 times per day
-ice water
-anticipating seeing my grandparents from Mississippi this week, a mini marriage retreat this weekend, and celebrating my brothers 30TH birthday! A good, full week ahead.
-going to bed at 10 p.m. On Saturday night. (ptl for bedtime, this girl is exhuasted!)
So blessed... So thankful.
Goodnight!