How about a little peek into what's been going on?
ha. Really though, this is just what it looks like when you try and take a self portrait holding the camera out when using a 50mm fixed lens.
It doesn't work very well.
But isn't my husband handsome?
So..an update. I've been a major blogging slacker, but that's just what happens when the weather gets warm.
Little miss Cato Potato has exited all forms of baby-hood and is a walking, talking toddler (with lots of hair! lots of wavy hair!). She's discovered this thing called a WILL, and man, does she show it. It's really fun to see her personality- but she's got some sass. =)
Not to mention, she's a breath holder.
And by that I mean... please don't make her mad.
Unless you want to watch her pass out.
I'm thankful that's all it is... just 'normal' toddler breath holding, not her heart, but it's far from pleasant to watch my little girl collapse.
She loves to be outside (aside, as she says), and always wants to 'sing' (swing). She likes the dirt and mud and grass and rocks... keeps up with Corban real well. She climbs everything and carries 'her' guitar and sippy cup around all day long.
Corbanator is my boy, my little buddy... we're at a really sweet place right now- leaving an incredibly hard place, and finally at a spot where I just enjoy him, tremendously enjoy him. He is so much fun, just loves life, loves people, loves conversation. I'm amazed by the things he thinks and says, these tender moments he has, the way he adores his daddy.
He's wonderful, too.
I'm so grateful for them both.
What precious, precious gifts.
This warm weather just doesn't leave much time for the computer.
And I am completely okay with that.
We spend most days outside. I love it. Love love love it.
We frequent the parks and get real dirty.
I usually take my camera with me, but am trying to use it on them a little less, play a little more.
I'm in so few pictures these days, I thought I'd snap a self-portrait while dressed up for a wedding over the weekend.
Some exciting things are happening for me...
and my camera.
I took some pictures for some friends (here) and put them on facebook.
Next thing you know, I had 3 emails from other people asking if I'd do pictures for them.
One of those inquiries turned into my first paid shoot that I completed over the weekend. I put one picture up from it on facebook and now have an additional three shoots lined up as well.
(and praise God! I am more excited about it than you could possibly ever imagine...)
So... right now, I'm working on building a portfolio, getting a website going, and of course, continuing to learn my camera and improve my skills.
It's been really fun and really encouraging and exciting. We'll see where things go- just taking it one step at a time.
And while we're talking about me.. I'm sure you'd like to know that I've rediscovered my love for medium roast coffee, light on the cream and running.
In case you were wondering, you know.
I had a brief 'I love sweet espresso drinks' phase but it's over.
And I thought my running career was forever done- after I got shocked by my defibrillator while running on a track, but I sucked it up, now wear a heart rate monitor, and have re-fallen in love with my favorite sport.
You want to talk about scary though! Yikes! A shock, indeed! It knocked me to knees. Not something I ever want to experience again.
I've also finally begun finishing my master bedroom (two and a half years later) and got rid of SIX garbage bags full of clothes from mine and Jordan's closet alone.
I have an extreme disgust for all this clutter lying around my house and I want it gone.
Also, I need a new haircut- I'm bored with this long, tangly mess-, am so glad it's garage sale season, and wish the play room would paint itself...because I sure don't have time to do it.
I know so many of you prayed for, loved on, helped my family through so much. I know many of you loved my little brother, enjoyed JD, appreciated his goofiness, loved those big blue eyes. I know that his life, the things he stood for and his boldness, even while facing death have challenged and encouraged your own faith.
I know many of you may never find your way to our hometown, and if you did... you may not even know where to go.
It's not a place of much rest for me, truthfully. My stomach knots just knowing where my van is heading. My heart breaks every time; I hate remembering the way he looked just before they shut the casket, hate remembering the way the casket looked before it was placed into the ground. I hate the patchy grass that's mostly dirt... reminding me of the freshness of our loss. Mostly, I just hate that he's gone. I miss JD. Every single day, I miss him.
I know... I know that he's with Jesus, that there's no more pain, that in His presence is the fullness of joy, at His right hand are pleasures forever more. My soul takes comfort in those thing- truly, it does- but it doesn't erase the ache of his absence... not at all. I was sweetly reminded last night, though, that our God is Lord of all- that He has been on the throne and is still on the throne... that He knew each and every day of JD's life before there was yet one of them- and He planned and purposed for each of those days and likewise for the days following his death, for us. Our God is a God of love. I'm resting in that, trusting in that, relying on that, adhering to that. I believe it with all that I am and I'm clinging to it.
Anyway- for what it is....it's beautiful.
He inspired us,
and he is so loved.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, Do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."
God's been good to us, friends. He's holding us still.
I want to thank you, though, for loving me, praying for me, sharing in our story here.
Thank you for your kind words, your timely phone call, for cleaning my house, quick emails, sweet cards in the mail, helping with my kids, Target/Starbucks giftcards (seriously... you've been SO good to me- and apparently know me well!).
Thank you for crying with me, for letting me cry, for letting me see your tears, for loving with me, for hurting with me.
Thank you for passing JD's story on, for remembering him, for letting me talk about him, for talking to me about him.
I have seen love in action like never before, and for that- I'm more grateful than you could ever know.
Even more so, I've seen the goodness of God, His faithfulness, and for that... I am also forever changed.
I only wish I would've gotten some of the family we stayed with!
Oh, and that I would've walked around with a notebook taking note of the things Kathy (Or Miss Caffeine, as Corban called her) said and did.
This family we stayed with are just amazing people... love the Lord, have hearts to serve, have raised amazing kids. I was so blessed watching the kids interact with each other, the respect they had for their parents, the way the house ran so smoothly.
Anyway, my kiddos enjoyed and it was great to spend some time with Wendi and Audri as well.
It was a wonderful, refreshing week.
And I look forward to a return visit in the future.
(and in case you're wondering- that waterfall picture is in the MIDDLE of DOWNTOWN Greenville, SC. Amazing. And beautiful.)
[*While walking one early spring day in Broadripple with a dear friend, we stumbled upon this yard... completely dead grass, with beautiful little blooms all over. It was breathtaking, and the most perfect picture of the state of my heart at that time.I'd like to think that my heart may also mirror the appearance of the yard now, after weeks of warmth and sunshine... mostly green, alive, well.Praise God for refreshing, renewal...joy that are once again present. How sweet is the morning when it finally comes...]
I wish I had time to say more on the subject, but...
I'm leaving for "Spring Break" in an hour, and I need to finish packing. We've got a really great week planned and I'm so looking forward to the time away - even if my husband will only be with us a little bit of the time. I'm going with one of my best friends to stay with a family who used to go to our church and now lives in South Carolina.
It will be a good time, I'm sure. Beautiful weather, with wonderful people, time away to relax and refresh.